Part time job offer that has some teeth to it. Wanted: crocodile response agents

People  leading a safe and predictable life who are looking for a novel and exciting job challenge with a definite edge to it might be interested in this employment offer. The Florida Fish and Wildlife Conservation Commission is putting out a call for people who are interested in working with crocodiles. Not exactly working with the crocs since humans don't usually work with the lizards unless you're a Steve Irwin and the like. Let's say...sort-of along side.

According to the blurb in the SunSentinel newspaper in south Florida, crocodile numbers are increasing and are putting in appearances in local canals, back yards and golf courses from the Florida Keys to the Palm Beach County. Not exactly the type of creature you want to encounter while hoeing your garden or teeing off on a golf green. It's  is a part-time position, which doesn't require experience although some contact dealing with crocodiles is preferred, and applicants must have a willingness to learn how to handle the sharp-toothed lizards.

"So stop beating around the bush and tell us about the job, Eleanor!"

The job description, which calls for those hired to re-locate nuisance crocodiles that meander into human territory, pays $25 per hour and offers outdoor enthusiasts the opportunity to work outdoors. Those hired will work in Miami-Dade County and the Upper Keys where the crocs are making frequent appearances. The position also requires a person who is none-confrontational and low key given that they will be dealing with humans who will not be pleased to learn that they may have to learn to live with appearances by the sharp-toothed lizards.

American crocodile numbers have risen from a low of 200 or so in the 1970s to about 2,000 today, with more of them roaming north from their core nesting areas in southern Everglades National Park and the Upper Florida Keys. Training will be provided one-on-one along side Florida Wildlife agents. How does one handle and re-locate crocodiles? Very carefully. A little bit of crocodile humor...

Those interested in applying - as exciting as this position is, I'll pass - email SNAP@myfwc.com, using the subject line "crocodile response agent."

Stuff - cats meows

The fashion world strives to re-invent itself designing creations that are unique yet sellable to attract the attention of potential buyers. Every year designers create trendy styles in the hope that they will be bought by people looking for that special look and something unique and different. It's only logical that fashionable pet owners would also want their four-legged furry companions with whom they share their lives, to wear the latest trendy togs.

When it comes to wearing animal fashions, cats are not a species that spring to mind given their independent and detached demeanor. Be that as it may, an online cyber boutique has created a line of hand-made leather and nickel silver battle armour for - wait for it - cats. The boutique, Etsy shop Schnaububle promotes its line as "100% wearable, flexible, and comfortable, the Cat Battle Armor is a for-real armor harness for your kitty."

The first thought that sprung to mind when reading the promo for the suit is how to convince a cat that it should wear something, anything, period. I mean, cats as a rule, are not a cooperative specie and it could be a battle royale trying to get kitty to wear a suit of armor.

The second thought is other than fashion vanity and one-up-man-ship, why would a cat require battle armor, period? According to the blurb, "your cat will become an unstoppable force for slaughter in this fully articulated suit, shielding him/her from foes while allowing unimpeded movement across the battlefield or living room floor.

So I'm thinking here, sending out a cat into battle on the back yard fence or anywhere, actually, in this type of outfit would be cause alone for a feline skirmish. I mean, you imagine the reaction of neighborhood cats upon spotting a kitty in armor?

"Hey! What's that thing crawling along the fence? Cheez - never seen anything like it before! Maybe we should attack!" the local kitty gang would utter, upon spotting the costumed combatant.

"It's me, Mittens! My owner made me wear this," the decked out cat would mew out.

"And you let her?" would be the logical question that would be asked, after which the cats would break out in uncontrollable laughter. Well they might.

But I digress.

The promotional blurb goes on:

"Your cat will become an unstoppable force for slaughter in this fully articulated suit, shielding him/her from foes while allowing unimpeded movement across the battlefield or living room floor. The imposing torso section features several riveted, articulated plates and a terrifying rack of dorsal spines. Your cat's hindquarters are sheathed beneath exquisitely arrayed overlapping scales stitched to a soft leather backing, adorned with nickel silver dome rivets. Midnight black scales and plates are finished with a glossy protective coat and seamlessly join together like the petals of a deadly flower. Adjustable at the collar with elastic and two nickel silver buckles, and at the belly with grommeted corset-style lacing for a secure, comfortable fit."

Somehow, the term, "force for slaughter" is somewhat disturbing as is "a terrifying rack of dorsal spines."

Strictly an observation and not being a cat owner and all, doubtful whether cats really need this type of protection. That being written, there is a big market for animal outfits. Head on down here: http://www.etsy.com/listing/175112598/cat-battle-armor  to see a cat wearing the suit.

There's a question and answer section for people who want to know how the creator got the cat to wear the outfit among other questions. So whad'ya think people reading this? Would you dress your cat in anything, never mind a suit of armor?

Speaking of Cats

There are pet cats and then there are pet cats that should be considered pets. Seems that an Indonesian man has what he believes to have made friends with a 400 pound Bengal tiger. It's rare that humans can strike up a friendship with a tiger but Abdullah Sholeh believes he has achieved it. He has even given his pet a name, Mulan Jamilah, who was given to him as a gift when it was a 3 month old cub.

The owner sleeps, plays and play fights with the tiger and frequently chooses to sleep alongside the cat in the tiger's enclosure instead of his own bed. This begs the question: why?  A tiger being a tiger and having the nature of a tiger, metal bars have been installed to separate the friends when they are together in an enclosure. Mulan is fed 13 pounds of chicken or goat meat twice per day. Let's hope that his appetite doesn't increase or he gets the urge for an in-between-meals snack.

"Dogs have owners, cats have staff."  ~Author Unknown