Some people call them fibs depending on the extent and depth of a made-up story. A fib is considered a small, trival lie but a lie is your grand daddy of a fib as in your new and never-met Nigerian friend left you a lot of money because of the spelling of your name.
It could be said that some people make an art of lying and this is the case with competitors who recently participated in the World's Biggest Liar Contest held at the Bridge Inn located in the English Lake District.
The origin of this contest dates back to the 19th century with one Will Ritson who lived and owned a pub in Wasdale Valley and had a reputation for telling stories about the heritage of the area. Some people believed his stories while others thought they were merely tall tales. Over the years Will's tales expanded to the point where it grew into "The World's Biggest Liar" competition held every November.
On November 20, liars from all over the globe gathered together at the Bridge Inn and when all the lies had been told, John "Johnny Liar" Graham took home the honors, again, for the 7th time.
Seven times... Those are some lies he must have told! Thinking further about this, one wonders if politicians are aware of this competition... I mean, it seems like a natural but I digress.
A local farmer, he clinched the title impressing 8 judges with a story/lie detailing the experience of a trip to Scotland in a wheelie bin (definition: A wheelie bin is a type of waste container and is made in several different types-Wikipedia) that went under the sea.
By the way did I mention there's a fortune waiting for everyone if your name contains the letters a, e, i, o, u and sometimes, y. Really...
Watch the liar in action in a video clip here: http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/uk_news/7741037.stm
Showing posts with label friends. Show all posts
Showing posts with label friends. Show all posts
Friday, November 21, 2008
Tuesday, January 29, 2008
BOYS TEST THE THEORY THAT TONGUE+FLAG POLE IN WINTER=PAIN
Many people reading this will recall the memorable scene in the seasonal favorite, "A Christmas Story" where young Flick is double-dared by his friends into testing whether his tongue would stick to a flagpole, causing teacher Miss Shields to comment:
"Now I know that some of you put Flick up to this, but he has refused to say who. But those who did it know their blame, and I'm sure that the guilt you must feel would be far worse than any punishment you might receive. Now, don't you feel terrible? Don't you feel remorse for what you have done? Well, that's all I'm going to say about poor Flick."
This time, though, not one but two 4th grade boys decided to do the same thing and found out first-hand that it worked.
Gavin Dempsey and James Alexander were serving on flag duty at Jackson Elementary School Friday morning, with the job of raising and lowering the school’s flags. They decided to see if their tongues really would stick to the cold metal.
“I decided to try it because I thought all of the TV shows were lies, but turns out I was wrong,” Gavin said.
Karen Alexander, James’ mother , said her son told her he got the idea from the movie, which is based on stories about a boy growing up in the northwest Indiana community of Hammond in the 1940s.
“I can’t believe he did it, but they learned their lesson,” she said.
James said he plans to eat a lot of ice cream to help nurse his wound.
“When you’re young, you’re just messing around,” he said.
Billie Dempsey, Gavin’s mom, said a nurse called them to tell them the boys’ tongues were bleeding.
“The nurse asked them, ‘OK, who double-dog dared who?”’ Billie Dempsey said, a reference to a phrase that a character in the movie used to dare another child to stick his tongue to the pole.
Thank goodness the boys relegated their true-to-life imitation to just their tongues and not other parts of their body.
Writers & Friends
www.jrslater.com/forum
"Now I know that some of you put Flick up to this, but he has refused to say who. But those who did it know their blame, and I'm sure that the guilt you must feel would be far worse than any punishment you might receive. Now, don't you feel terrible? Don't you feel remorse for what you have done? Well, that's all I'm going to say about poor Flick."
This time, though, not one but two 4th grade boys decided to do the same thing and found out first-hand that it worked.
Gavin Dempsey and James Alexander were serving on flag duty at Jackson Elementary School Friday morning, with the job of raising and lowering the school’s flags. They decided to see if their tongues really would stick to the cold metal.
“I decided to try it because I thought all of the TV shows were lies, but turns out I was wrong,” Gavin said.
Karen Alexander, James’ mother , said her son told her he got the idea from the movie, which is based on stories about a boy growing up in the northwest Indiana community of Hammond in the 1940s.
“I can’t believe he did it, but they learned their lesson,” she said.
James said he plans to eat a lot of ice cream to help nurse his wound.
“When you’re young, you’re just messing around,” he said.
Billie Dempsey, Gavin’s mom, said a nurse called them to tell them the boys’ tongues were bleeding.
“The nurse asked them, ‘OK, who double-dog dared who?”’ Billie Dempsey said, a reference to a phrase that a character in the movie used to dare another child to stick his tongue to the pole.
Thank goodness the boys relegated their true-to-life imitation to just their tongues and not other parts of their body.
Writers & Friends
www.jrslater.com/forum
Saturday, July 21, 2007
WELL-KNOWN COMEDIANS PLAY IT "JUST FOR LAUGHS" IN MONTREAL NO LESS!
One thing that can be said about Montreal at this time of the year is that things take a funny turn. It's all due to the fact that the annual "Just for Laughs Comedy Festival" comes to town along with the appearance of some of the best known stand-ups accross the world.
In the past Jerry Seinfeld, Ray Romano, Jon Stewart and other famous or recognized "names" have made their name doing gigs "back when." This year William Shatner who is now as famous for his TV selling as his Capt. Kirk role, hosted a Gala comedy show as is Billy Connelly. All-in-all -Montreal bubbles-over with laughter and the place where humor rules. Pure entertainment and then some.
The names and comedians may have changed but the jokes and comedy are still the same with jokes that "slay." Here's a sampling of some of the best:"
"In a relationship you have to communicate, which means listening to her talk. Ladies, you fake orgasms. We fake listening."
"I'm a black male, over 40, with no kids, living in the suburbs they wanted to put me in a museum. Why did I move to the suburbs? I started watching Desperate Housewives. If comedy didn't work out I can always try gardening."
"Women like jewelry. They're like racoons: show them some shiny stuff and they'll follow you home."
(Alonzo Bodden)
"I was in college: I went to I.O.U." "I was studying psychology and then I went straight into therapy."
"Twenty five years ago there were no computers. Can you imagine your job without solitaire?"
(Wendy Liebman)
"Marriage is built on paranoia and mistrust. I get up in the middle of the night to go to the bathroom and she wakes up out of dead sleep to say where are you going? Why, to have sex with the midget I store in the medicine closet,"
( Tom Papa)
"If the food needed pepper, it should be on it."
(Michael McIntyre (a Brit) on obsequious waiters)
"I told my mother I wanted to grow up and be a comedian. She said you can't do both."
"I was just at the airport. Those treadmills they've got are huge."
"My friend said you have to read this book, it's a page turner. Well, I know how books work." (Jimmy Carr)
"I'm proud of my grandfather. He shot down two German planes. Unfortunately this was in 1972, but you can never be too careful."
(John Moloney)
"In Dubai I got a throat infection and I coughed up phlegm and accidentally ordered a taxi to the airport."
(Sean Meo)
"You know you're fat when you drop something and say do I need that'?"
(Robert Kelly)
"In the German lottery, they don't pick six winning numbers. No, they eee-eliminate 43 numbers."
(John Moloney)
"Over 100 metres, crocodiles are faster than horses.. Don't know how many horses it took to prove that."
"Corn-fed, farm-reared chicken, good at tennis. I don't want to know about his childhood. I just want to eat the bloody thing."
(Danny Bhoy)
"People assume life in hell is hell. But they've got it all wrong. The devil looks on fondly on the sinners. He tells them: You've lied. You've cheated. You've stolen. Why, you've done the devil's bidding. Help yourself to drugs and hookers forever.' It's heaven that has to be the eternal bore."
(Jim Jeffries)
"Just caught CNN's Larry King and Britney Spears on the tube in a meeting of the mind."
(Dave Attell)
Writers & Friends
www.jrslater.com/forum
In the past Jerry Seinfeld, Ray Romano, Jon Stewart and other famous or recognized "names" have made their name doing gigs "back when." This year William Shatner who is now as famous for his TV selling as his Capt. Kirk role, hosted a Gala comedy show as is Billy Connelly. All-in-all -Montreal bubbles-over with laughter and the place where humor rules. Pure entertainment and then some.
The names and comedians may have changed but the jokes and comedy are still the same with jokes that "slay." Here's a sampling of some of the best:"
"In a relationship you have to communicate, which means listening to her talk. Ladies, you fake orgasms. We fake listening."
"I'm a black male, over 40, with no kids, living in the suburbs they wanted to put me in a museum. Why did I move to the suburbs? I started watching Desperate Housewives. If comedy didn't work out I can always try gardening."
"Women like jewelry. They're like racoons: show them some shiny stuff and they'll follow you home."
(Alonzo Bodden)
"I was in college: I went to I.O.U." "I was studying psychology and then I went straight into therapy."
"Twenty five years ago there were no computers. Can you imagine your job without solitaire?"
(Wendy Liebman)
"Marriage is built on paranoia and mistrust. I get up in the middle of the night to go to the bathroom and she wakes up out of dead sleep to say where are you going? Why, to have sex with the midget I store in the medicine closet,"
( Tom Papa)
"If the food needed pepper, it should be on it."
(Michael McIntyre (a Brit) on obsequious waiters)
"I told my mother I wanted to grow up and be a comedian. She said you can't do both."
"I was just at the airport. Those treadmills they've got are huge."
"My friend said you have to read this book, it's a page turner. Well, I know how books work." (Jimmy Carr)
"I'm proud of my grandfather. He shot down two German planes. Unfortunately this was in 1972, but you can never be too careful."
(John Moloney)
"In Dubai I got a throat infection and I coughed up phlegm and accidentally ordered a taxi to the airport."
(Sean Meo)
"You know you're fat when you drop something and say do I need that'?"
(Robert Kelly)
"In the German lottery, they don't pick six winning numbers. No, they eee-eliminate 43 numbers."
(John Moloney)
"Over 100 metres, crocodiles are faster than horses.. Don't know how many horses it took to prove that."
"Corn-fed, farm-reared chicken, good at tennis. I don't want to know about his childhood. I just want to eat the bloody thing."
(Danny Bhoy)
"People assume life in hell is hell. But they've got it all wrong. The devil looks on fondly on the sinners. He tells them: You've lied. You've cheated. You've stolen. Why, you've done the devil's bidding. Help yourself to drugs and hookers forever.' It's heaven that has to be the eternal bore."
(Jim Jeffries)
"Just caught CNN's Larry King and Britney Spears on the tube in a meeting of the mind."
(Dave Attell)
Writers & Friends
www.jrslater.com/forum
Saturday, April 21, 2007
Fate? Destiny? Boy saves friend's life with Heimlich manoeuver
With all the negative news that the media reports, it's always refreshing and uplifting to find a good news story, especially when it involves young people.
Probably hundreds of thousands of people taking a CPR course also received instruction on using the Heimlich manoeuver to help dislodge a person choking on an object. There are two levels with one for adults and another for children and babies. Few people actually expect to use it least of all a young boy who saved the life of his friend using the Heimlich.
If ever there was a case for fate and being in the right place at the right time, this story will make you a believer.
Last Wednesday, Travis Hayes of Cape Breton, Nova Scotia, CA, was in his 6th grade classroom sucking on a peppermint candy when a fellow classmate did something funny that made him laugh. Somehow during his laughter, the peppermint somehow slipped down and became lodged in his windpipe. Upon realizing that the young boy was choking, his teacher used the Heimlich manoeuver but couldn't remove the candyand a trip to an adjoining classroom to get assistance was unfruitful.
Fellow classmate, Tristan Unsworth who was a skateboard buddy of Travis, assumed that his friend might be fooling around but upon seeing saliva dripping out of Travis's mouth and his facing turning red, he realized his friend was in stress and choking. As luck would have it or some would call it fate, Tristan having taken a babysitting course that included a life saving technique given by the school in February, knew exactly what to do. He wrapped his arms around his friend's stomach and dislodged the candy with one strong abdominal thrust. Taking it all in his stride once Tristan saw and heard Travis cough, he cooly walked back to his seat.
Talk about a good friend! As mentioned he was in the right place at the right time...
Fate? Destiny? Luck?
Writers & Friends
www.jrslater.com/forum
Probably hundreds of thousands of people taking a CPR course also received instruction on using the Heimlich manoeuver to help dislodge a person choking on an object. There are two levels with one for adults and another for children and babies. Few people actually expect to use it least of all a young boy who saved the life of his friend using the Heimlich.
If ever there was a case for fate and being in the right place at the right time, this story will make you a believer.
Last Wednesday, Travis Hayes of Cape Breton, Nova Scotia, CA, was in his 6th grade classroom sucking on a peppermint candy when a fellow classmate did something funny that made him laugh. Somehow during his laughter, the peppermint somehow slipped down and became lodged in his windpipe. Upon realizing that the young boy was choking, his teacher used the Heimlich manoeuver but couldn't remove the candyand a trip to an adjoining classroom to get assistance was unfruitful.
Fellow classmate, Tristan Unsworth who was a skateboard buddy of Travis, assumed that his friend might be fooling around but upon seeing saliva dripping out of Travis's mouth and his facing turning red, he realized his friend was in stress and choking. As luck would have it or some would call it fate, Tristan having taken a babysitting course that included a life saving technique given by the school in February, knew exactly what to do. He wrapped his arms around his friend's stomach and dislodged the candy with one strong abdominal thrust. Taking it all in his stride once Tristan saw and heard Travis cough, he cooly walked back to his seat.
Talk about a good friend! As mentioned he was in the right place at the right time...
Fate? Destiny? Luck?
Writers & Friends
www.jrslater.com/forum
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