Shaken - not stirred - 50 years of 007

Just thinking how to go about celebrating this day. In case you weren't aware of it and count me in among those who aren't, October 5, 2012, will be Global James Bond Day. According to a promotional blurb, producers Michael G. Wilson and Barbara Broccoli, who added their two-cents-worth, "We are absolutely thrilled to be celebrating James Bond's golden addniversary on film with this special day of events for Bond fans around the world." Especially since another new Bond film is about to be released.

The word, "golden" infers 50 years so one assumes it's a means in which to mark fifty years of Bond films. Personally and in my view, Sean Connery exemplified "the" James Bond. Among my favorite is "You Only Live Twice", where James must find and stop some baaaad dudes from a skyjacking in order to prevent a nuclear war. Also on high on my like list is "Dr. No" where James has to stop SPECTRE from stopping rocket launches. The worst Bond portrayer in my view, was George Lazenby, who merely went through the motions in the film, "On Her Majesty's Secret Service." Just didn't have the necessary Bond qualities. You know - charm, finesse, hero qualities and cocktail mixing know-how. Sorry but Daniel Craig doesn't do it for me, either. Just doesn't have that Bond charm. Roger Moore and Pierce Brosnan did fit the bill but Sean still was the best.

The planned events to celebrate the golden anniversary includes a global online and live charity auction event organized by Christie's in London; a global survey in find out favorite Bond films, country-by-country; a Music of Bond Night in Los Angeles. Interesting to note that there are no special new martinis created in which to honor the man.

As Bond aficienodos know, 007 liked his martins, shaken - not stirred. However, recently and for whatever reason, Bond was made to gave up his martini in favor of imbibing in...well...beer. This was a very shocking move - at least for me. James Bond drinking a beer? What next? Maybe out of a bottle no less? Not that there's anything wrong with beer. Love a cold beer on a hot summer's day and enjoy it mixed with an un-cola but somehow and in my eyes, James Bond's personna does not go with beer.

SEDUCTIVE SPY
Make me a drink, James. You know - something cold that willcool down my hot mouth and slide down my throat

007
Got just the thing

SEDUCTIVE SPY
I heard that you're very adept in the liquid refreshment area, among other places

007
Watch me. First I take a bottle opener. Then I slip it under the bottle cap slowly, very slowly, pry the cap off until it gives in. Then I pour the contents into a large glass slowly and carefully and - voila!

SEDUCTIVE SPY
(putting on her clothes and heding for the door)
Sorry James but beer doesn't do it for me. Another time - another place... 'Boris - dahlink...'

But I digress.

Among the celebrations is an auction of Bond-related items to be auctioned off by Christie's on line until October 5 to benefit charities. Here is the coordinates for people who are interested in bidding on a momento: http://www.christies.com/sales/50-years-of-james-bond-september-2012/sale-info.aspx

Here is a clip from another of my favorites, "The Spy Who Loved Me" with Roger Moore as Bond. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qgh-SAuT7hs

For those so inclined, here is the recipe for a James Bond Martini as per www.drinksmixer.com:

3 oz. gin
1 oz. vodka
1/2 oz. white wine

Pour gin, vodka and wine into a cocktail shaker half-filled with crracked ice. Shake well (not stirred obviously to get the real Bond feel.) and strain into a chilled cocktail glass. Garnish with a twist of lemon and serve.

How do you plan to celebrate?

 

  

Teen makes his point and fights for right to have 16" Mohawk

Chances are that for many people reading this, the option of a hair style is left to the taste of the wear-ee. A 17-year old high school senior, Asher Stonesifer, wants the right to wear his hair as he pleases and he's going all out to make his point.

The point in this case, is his 16-inch Mohawk, which does not please his high school principal, who has banned the senior from wearing it in this style. For the unaware, a Mohawk consists of carefully formed hair spikes that stand on their own. Stonesifer, who has been wearing this style since March 2011, was informed by the principal that his Mohawk was a distraction and health and safety hazard.

So, I'm thinking here, maybe a Mohawk is not to everyone's liking but not sure about the health and safety hazard aspect. Perhaps - pure speculation - if touched it could...I dunno...pierce skin or something and maybe it could block somebody from seeing over his head from the back. But I digress.

The school principal instructed Stonesifer not to wear the Mohawk during school hours, but after discussing it with his mother, Stonesifer defied the order was

Asher Stonesifer, 17, vowed to continue his “fight for the right to spike,” even after DeLand High School principal Mitch Moyer upheld his decision to ban the senior from wearing his hair in a 16-inch Mohawk, the Daytona Beach News-Journal reports.
According to Stonesifer, Moyer told the teen this week that the “liberty spikes” he had been sporting sporadically since March 2011 were a distraction and a health and safety hazard. Stonesifer was instructed not to style his hair like that during school hours again.
After discussing with his mother, who believes controlling student hairstyles is “a free speech issue," Stonesifer returned to school on Tuesday boasting his signature spikes as a form of protest. He was promptly sent home for insubordination.
Bay News 9 reports the Volusia County Schools dress code includes no mention of hair, but can be adapted at the principal’s discretion.
"The dress code says that the principal has to determine whether or not it is appropriate for an educational setting, if it's too extreme if it causes a disruption," district spokesperson Nancy Wait said.
On Wednesday, the principal agreed to discuss with school district officials a proposal that would allow the senior to continue wearing his hair spikes in school, provided they were cut to a 10-inch length.
However, on Thursday superintendent Tom Russell informed Moyer the decision rests with the school principal, and Moyer has elected to not budge from his original stance.

Meanwhile, according to the News-Journal, Stonesifer continued to collect signatures for a petition on Thursday in hopes of changing the policy.
Stonesifer told WOFL it takes him about two hours to style his hair every morning, depending on how many spikes he adds. He also said he is seeking a new world record for the tallest “Liberty Spike Mohawk,” which currently stands at 3.6 feet.
According to Moyer, the 17-year-old will be permitted to wear his hair up during the school’s annual Spirit Week, which encourages students to “dress out of the norm” in an effort to boost excitement for the homecoming football game.

Ig Nobel awards for people who accomplish cool...stuff

Every year the Ig Nobel Prizes honor achievements, which are supposed to make people laugh and then make them think. The prizes, according to the Ig Nobel site, "are intended to celebrate the unusual, honor the imaginative — and spur people's interest in science, medicine and technology."

It's really interesting to note the imagination and thought process that goes into the creation and conception of the ideas. So without further ado, here is the full list of 2012 Ig Nobel winners and their distinction:

We start out with the Psychology Prize, won by Anita Eerland and Rolf Zwaan of the Netherlands and Tulio Guadalupe (Peru/Russia/Netherlands), who were recognized for their study, "Leaning to the Left Makes the Eiffel Tower Seem Smaller." As a person who has visited the tower, never really gave it much consideration as to whether or not leaning left or right actually made it appear smaller. I mean, the only thing noticeable is that the tower is tall. Period. One - me  - wonders the amount of leaning the team did to arrive at this conclusion.

Following this interesting and thought-provoking conclusion, the Peace Prize was won by the SKN Company (Russia), for converting old Russian ammunition into new diamonds. The word "diamonds" caught my attention. I'm thinking here...what type of ammunition did they use in order to obtain diamonds? Also, who were the recipients of said diamonds and how does one apply to get a free sample?

The prize for Accoustics was awarded to Kazutaka Kurihara and Koji Tsukada (Japan), for creating the SpeechJammer, a machine that disrupts a person's speech by making them hear their own spoken words at a very slight delay. Now this just could be something that the world has been waiting for, in that it would be a perfect tool when listening to politician's speeches. More to the point, making the politicians actually listen to the...interesting promises they make. But I digress.

Nothing fishy when it comes to the Neuroscience Prize, which went to Craig Bennett, Abigail Baird, Michael Miller and George Wolford (US), for demonstrating that brain researchers, by using complicated instruments and simple statistics, can see meaningful brain activity anywhere - even in dead salmon. So this makes me wonder: why one would want to see if there is brain activity in a dead salmon. Why not just eat it, don't you think?

Seems that some people really have bad hair days as Johan Pettersson (Sweden/Rwanada) awarded the Chemistry Prize for solving the puzzle of why, in certain hosues in the town of Anderslov, Sweden, people's hair turned green. Maybe - pure speculation - somebody added green coloring to certain people's water as an April Fool's joke or something, or perhaps they just liked green hair. Go know, but Johan Pertersson seems to feel he had the right answer and has been rewarded for announcing it.

The US Government General Accountability Office won the Literature Prize no less, for issuing a report about reports about reports that recommends the preparation of a report about the report about reports about reports. One - me - wonders what was in the report that recommended the report, etc. etc....

This accomplishment is something we all have been waiting to hear. For calculating the balance of forces that shape and move the hair in a human ponytail, Joseph Keller (US), Raymond Goldstein (US/UK), Patrick Warren and Robin Ball (UK) were recognized for noting this. Seems that Prof. Keller was also given an Ig for his work and study on non-drip teapots in 1999, but for which he was wrongly overlooked. Now this is a very important study, people! Non-drip teapots could be a real discovery for tea drinkers everywhere. Imagine pouring a cup of tea and not having to worry whether or not it will stain the table cloth. It's good that Prof. Keller was eventually recognized for his contribution.

Another interesting award, Fluid Dynamics Prize, was given to Rouslan Krechetnikov (US/Russia/Canada) and Hans Mayer (US) for their study of the dynamics of liquid sloshing, to learn the results of what happens while carrying a cup of coffee. Now why would this study focus strictly on coffee and not tea, for example? Or soft drink? Or juice...etc.? This leads one - me - to wonder whether the chemical makeup of coffee has an affect on sloshing? Sloshing by the way, is the what happens to liquids as they move from side-to-side while being carried. Now you know.

The Anatomy Prize was given to Frans de Waal (Netherlands/US) and Jennifer Pokorny (US) for discovering that chimpanzees can identify other chimpanzees individually from seeing photographs of their rear ends.

Last but certainly not least, Emmanuel Ben Soussan and Michel Antonietti was received the Medicine Prize for advising doctors who perform colonoscopies, how to minimize the chance their patients will explode. People who have had colonoscopies will be happy that their odds of exploding. have been minimized. Imagine the mess.

So there we have it, this year's Ig Nobel distinctions. How could we have existed the entire year without knowing about them? Definitely food for thought - or something.

Santa was a smoker?

Upon first reading that Santa had given up smoking and to be honest, it never occurred to me that the jolly, old elf smoked. Recalling the poem ,"The Night Before Christmas", and checking out the exact wording, a line reads: "The stump of a pipe he held tight in his teeth, and the smoke it encircled his head like a wreath." It confirmed as we all know that the man-in-red was a pipe smoker.

The issue of Santa Claus smoking has come up with an edited version of the poem, which has eliminated the referral to a pipe-smoking Santa. A Canadian independent publisher and a smoking cessation advocate, Pamela McColl, has taken it upon herself to edit the poem and eliminate the smoking line in the hope of discouraging young people to smoke. While her goal is admirable, one wonders  - me - if this is such a good idea. As mentioned, the line slipped right by me or perhaps I never really gave it much thought. Given the overall vision of the poem as a whole, Santa smoking a pipe didn't strike me as important.

Thinking further, there is no mention in the poem as to how often Santa smoked his pipe. One - me - wonders if he was a regular pipe smoker or an occasional pipe smoker, or a once-in-a-while pipe-smoker, using it once per year when he delivered toys to girls and boys. How do we know whether it was tobacco that Santa smoked or perhaps a non-addictive herb? I mean, there is greenery in the North Pole and Santa being Santa wise and all, he could have known that tobacco was not healthy. Am I right?

Moreover, Frosty the Snowman just could suffer a similar fate. Let's not forget that the popular snowman has/had a corn cob pipe. Could the song incur a similar fate:

"Frosty the Snowman, Was a jolly, happy soul, With a corncob pipe and button nose..."

True there's no mention of whether he at any time actually smoked the pipe but a pipe is a pipe is...and where there's a pipe there could be tobacco and smoke.

As a writer, somehow the tampering with a beloved poem bothers me, even though the intent is honorable. There are some things that should be viewed in the context it was written as Clement Clarke Moore's view of his perfect Christmas.


http://news.nationalpost.com/2012/09/18/after-200-years-santa-kicks-a-bad-habit-publisher-activist-update-twas-the-night-before-christmas-take-away-st-nicks-pipe/

Part deux: spaghetti and oyster slurping how-to

As mentioned in a previous blog entry, there is an accepted etiquette when eating foods that require some expertise. Debrett's - the guide when it comes to eating 'how-to' - covers many of the more challenging food choices, offering advice as to the socially correct way to eat.

Pasta is a particular challenge for many diners. The partaking of pasta can present a particular problem. According to Debrett's, classic pasta should be consumed only with a fork. This action, IMHO, is easier said (or written) than done and can be a tricky feat. It (Debrett's) suggests that spaghetti be twisted into a small presumably round-ish bundle around fork tines by "twirling it clockwise against the side of the dish."

This leads one - me - to wonder the end result if - say - an attempt was made to to perform this action counter-clockwise? Has anybody reading this been daring enough to test this action and does it work as well? Is it an illegal act to twirl pasta anti-clockwise and is a fine involved? But I digress.

For whatever reason and personally it doesn't make sense to me, it's a social faux-pas to cut the pasta threads with the side of the fork. Let me state for the record that - gasp - I cut my pasta with a knife to make the eating easier. Let's be candid: it's not easy to get the hang of pasta twirling. Even when this is achieved, the end result can be a stray pasta strand that adheres itself to the chin, or worse, fall on to a piece of clothing. This leads to the issue of the etiquette of retrieving a pasta strand and whether or not it's an acceptable act to use a fingers or fork retrieval. Does one leave it "as is" or does it require removal? Another point to ponder is whether guests sitting at a table should point out a visible strand pasta.

"Excuse me but you've got spaghetti on your top," a co-diner might remark in the way of being helpful.

"Oh really?" the spaghetti drop-ee might respond, looking down to verify the observation. "Thank you for noticing and bringing it to my attention," the drop-ee could respond, while pondering the next step to take.

It could lead one to wonder whether it would be considered gauche to dip a napkin in the water glass to eliminate a stain. What about the usage of a commercial stain remover stick in public? These are important issues worthy of an answer not mentioned in Debretts! Related to this, is it socially allowable to wear a bib or place a napkin at the chin?

According to another etiquette-ist, Emily Post, who has another point of view: ''Most restaurants (and hostesses) that feature pasta provide guests with a large spoon as well as the knife and fork. The fork is used to spear a few strands of spaghetti, the tips are placed against the spoon, which is held on its side, in the left hand, and the fork is twirled, wrapping the spaghetti around itself as it turns. If no spoon is provided, the tips of the fork may be rested against the curve of the plate.'' '-- The New Emily Post's Etiquette, Elizabeth L. Post, 1975

Moving on to another tricky food option, oysters aren't everyone's cup of tea so to speak. Although they're very tasty in my experience, visually they resemble - well - throat slime. They also require some dexterity in extricating them from their home in their shells and an oyster shucker is used for this purpose. That's the easy part. The difficulty for some people is in the actual eating. On the advice once more of Debrett's, "pick up the shell and bring the widest end to your lips. Tilt, and slide the entire contents of the shell - the oyster and all the juices - directly into your mouth from the shell." Once in the mouth, it can be chewed (blech) or swallow it down whole. On this aspect, Debrett's recommends that chewing is a good option in order to "savour the unique briny, metallic taste of the oyster." Savor the metallic taste? I mean, oysters are...okay but somehow savoring the taste of metal doesn't do it for me, at least.

There is also a section devoted to eating snails. Pass. Somehow eating a food whose relatives I've stepped on in the garden doesn't do it for me.

Stories that make you ask, "why?" Of zombies, kitty awards, Rembrandt...and other stuff

It's yet another edition of those interesting and quirky stories that seem to pop up on the cyber highway of life, which make you shake your head with wonder, awe and puzzlement.

A zombie throws his hat in the presidential ring

Given the popularity of zombies these days, it isn't surprising that this didn't happen earlier. Not sure how this will go over with fellow candidates but a Mr. A. Zombie and wife, Patty Morgan-Zombie, made their presence known at the Democratic National Convention to "highlight the plight of the zombie community".

Oh the angst and anonymity of being a zombie!

In providing an explanation as to why he is running, Mrs. Zombie explained that "my husband is running for president, because he could have taken a certain issue issue lying down, well, because he was already lying down, but he decided to stand up and pledge to fight for equal viewing opportunities for all."

Part of his platform included improving the lives of zombies everywhere and get them more jobs.  More jobs? Does this mean that unbeknownst to us, there are zombies working among us? Perhaps - pure speculation on my part - this could explain the working philosophy of many politicians.

Mr. and Mrs. or Ms Zombie are using the event to draw attention to their series, "The Walking Dead", on the Dish Network, which dropped the show after a contract dispute. At least that's the claim and they're sticking to it. Blood and guts weren't involed.

Elephant art goes for big bucks

Some of us produce painted masterpieces and hope for the best in finding a buyer. Then there are some artists in the animal world that have ready purchasers. A Czech female Asian elephant, Shanti (love that name) whose studio is in the Prague Zoo, is creating canvases that are selling for £1,000 and expectations are that their value will rise with time. They are being auctioned off for a good cause with the funds being put towards the purchase of veterinary equipment for an elephant zoo in Sri Lanka.

The elephant/artist was handed a brush by her keeper who taught her how to grasp it and the rest, as they say, is history. Her (Shanti) motivation to create elephantine art is food but for whatever reason, possible artistic block (been there - experienced that), she has not produced any new art making the current canvases a limited edition, which could go up in value. In case someone reading this is in the area, Shanti's art is on display at the Marthi Gallery in Prague, Czechoslovakia. No indication on the medium used.

Fowl language gets pet into trouble

Cockatoos are known to have an extensive vocabulary and will pick up words and mimic song lyrics among other tricks. Sometimes, however and depending on who's doing the teaching, it can get a bird into legal trouble.

Willy, a cockatoo, was accused of allegedly and repeatedly calling a neighbor "a whore." The incident is part of a year-long dispute between two neighbors that lead to legal proceedings. The bird and its owner are being accused in Municipal Court of violating the city's animal-noise law. I mean and JMHO, even if the bird did say this, perhaps it was referring to - I dunno - a passing squirrel...another bird... Go know! One - me - wonders if the bird will be called to testify in its own defence.

JUDGE
Willy - did you call Ms Blah-Blah a whore?"

WILLY
(head bobbing up-and-down)
One-two-three-four... Willy can open the door

He could have meant that...

Definitely the cat's meow

Some - most cats actually - do whatever they want, ignoring human presence. Then there are cats that acquire fame and become Internet video stars and become recognized for being a...cat.

A film festival dedicated to cats, recognized its first winner and recipient of the Golden Kitty Award, for being part of the most popular cat-based video that has gone viral on YouTube. The winner, Henri 2, who was the main and only star of Paw de Deux, directed and shot by William Braden, featured Henri doing what cats do best, lay around and look bored.

In the video, Henri (written the french way) is heard to utter phrases while staring out of a window that include, "I am free to go yet I remaiI alone feel this torment. The 15 hours a day I sleep have no effect. I wake to the same tedium." He also opines later, "I alone feel this torment. I am surrounded by morons."

The cat celeb acquired more than 10,000 votes to give him first place. No indication who was in second, third...and subsequent places. The video was filmed in the same manner as the Academy Award film, "The Artist" and the award handed out in the Walker Art Gallery in Minneapolis.
Here is the award winning cat in his starring role: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q34z5dCmC4M

New Jersey mom sleepwalks her way on to YouTube

Not sure how most moms would react but when Nick Foti saw his mom sleepwalking, he decided to catch the moment on video.  He then opened up his mom's night time stroll by sharing it with YouTube viewers. In the video, Nick captures mom dancing around and goes into an explanation as to the rationale behind her moves.

Rather than merely relating the story, here is the video. You judge whether mom has all the right moves.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aNYT_rOgvIA

Just thinking...not sure if all moms would welcome being highlighted on YouTube. Whad'ya think?

Painting bought in U.S. flea market a $$$ masterpiece

Like many people reading this will agree, it's lots of fun browsing the goods on sale at flea markets. You never know what bargains can be found and sometimes the purchase turns out to be worth big bucks.

A Virginia woman who was looking through the tables at a local flea market saw a doll, part of a box filled with items seemingly of no value, which caught her eye so she bought the box for $50. Presumably pleased with the purchase, she never imagined in her wildest dreams that the box also contained - wait for it - a painting with the signature that read, Renoir. "The" Renoir. Before finding out that her purchase was a real bargain that most of us dream about and liking the frame, she began ripping the back of the painting but stopped on the advice of her mother who thought the painting could be worth a lot of money. That's a real understatement. After checking out the painting, it turned out to be Renoir's, "Paysage Bords du Seine" that is expected to bring $100,000 when auctioned off.

Here is a photo of the painting: http://artsbeat.blogs.nytimes.com/2012/09/07/a-possible-renoir-surfaces-at-a-virginia-flea-market/

As I've frequently said upon reading these articles, mine go for a lot less. What did you find at the flea market, lately?