Saturday, March 31, 2007

NEW JOB OPPORTUNITY - NO EXPERIENCE NECESSARY

Perhaps there are people reading this that are contemplating changing their jobs and looking for something that offers growth potential. A job in which people can stretch their abilities and move up in the world. If so - you don't have to look any further.

The Durex company in the UK, a company synonymous with condoms, has been deluged with job-related queries since it advertised for condom testers. You read it right. Condom testers.

The company is looking for 5,000 people who are single, married or in a couple-relationship to report their - um - experiences using its condoms and lubricants.

According to the report there are no restrictions with both males and females welcome and all ethnic groups and/or sexual orientation have been directed to the company's web site. This job opportunity has lots of appeal since 14,000 applicants applied the first day it ran an ad fors a similar project in France. UK panelists (participants) will be asked to report on line on their experience focusing on how enjoyable the condoms and lubricans were and whether they improved their sex lives.

Here is Durex UK's site in case you want to volunteer: http://www.durex.com/uk/

There is no information as to whether non-Brits may participate and if so, whether outsiders are expected bring their own condoms.

(found on Ananova.com)


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Friday, March 30, 2007

AIR GUITAR NATION - the sound of (guitar) silence

This is one belongs in the "what next?" category - at least for me, anyway.

Haven't seen it yet and I doubt whether I will but there's a film, "Air Guitar Nation" that is devoted to the non-playing of a guitar. The film, a documentary directed by Alexandra Lipsitz, focuses upon the "art" of pretending to play the guitar. Just like on home videos.

The film covers a festival originating in Finland in which (presumably-but-not-necessarily) people who aspire to playing a guitar, settle for playing an invisible guitar. The end result is - well - silence except for the amps and speakers that blare out the music to which the none guitar players...don't play along. Or something like that.

Can air flute nation or air harp nation or air violin nation be far behind? The possibilities stagger the mind.

http://www.airguitarnation.com/new/


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Thursday, March 29, 2007

HE'S BAAAACK...SANJAYA SURVIVES TO SING ANOTHER WEEK

In spite of what can best be described as pony tails pulled back and aligned in mohawk style down the centre of his scalp, the "It" boy has survived to sing again. Sing might be a poor choice of words... Hum and mumble a lot. Show a lot of teeth for sure. Shake the pony tails definitely.

It's obvious that U.S. teeny boppers up to teens and maybe even beyond, really don't give a damn about what and how Sanjaya Malakar sings. They have for some bizarre reason fallen for what could be the first anti-Idol since the show's inception. Also incredulous is that his popularity is such that he is ranked third in popular searches on Technorati with AI right behind in fourth place. What does this mean in the scheme of things? It means that Sanjaya, love him or hate him, is getting a lot of publicity for the show and ergo, bringing in the $$$ for sponsors of the show.

To think that someone of. Sanjaya's none-talent calibre can garner enough support from the American viewing public to stay around for yet another week is truly amazing . Singer Chris Sligh gets his walking papers and the pony boy stays? Something is wrong with this picture.

What's even more scary is that Sanjaya could win. Truly a disturbing thought.


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Wednesday, March 28, 2007

AI's SANJAYA SWITCHES (AND SWISHES) TO PONYTAILS...KIND-OF

Andy Warhol commented that "everyone gets their 15 minutes of fame." In the case of American Idol singer and that term is used very loosely in the case of Sanjaya Malakar, his 15 minutes of fame were over a long time ago. At least they should have been. How and why he's still around is a mystery. Like Samson his strength appears to be in his hair. Actually upon reflection, its non-style, non-descript. It's just...there growing on top of his head.

So last night in order to keep viewers interested in his performances, he tried something new. Not exactly new because females have been wearing pony tails since the 50's and 60's. However, when a male and one that's part of such a high visibility show as AI decides to go "pony tail/mohawk-y" - a person has to wonder who his "advisers" are. Not one pony tail mind you but at least seven...maybe more (who counts!) all in a row in kind of mohawk mini-ponies, one can only assume that it is Sanjayas attempt to look - well - macho. Who's his hairdresser? The Texas Chain Saw Massacre-er?

Gimme a break!

We can only hope that this new look will really be the icing on the cake and he will become a distant memory. If not - who knows what he'll turn into next. Michael Jackson?


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Monday, March 26, 2007

THE TOILET PAPERS...OR A PAPER-LESS FLUSH-LESS UNIVERSE

Each November a World Toilet Expo and forum is held somewhere in the world to discuss toilet-related issues. In the past the talk has covered areas that include keeping public toilets clean...new products on the market place including a sanitary bin with the world’s first automatic no-touch compressing laminate mechanism which seals disposed sanitary napkins. Important stuff and issues like that. Unfortunately for some reason, I somehow I missed it. Darned!

Anywaaaaay... Came accross an interesting site that promotes a new type of toilet called "the washlet." This new sassy model boasts itself to be a paper-free toilet or a "warm-water personal-cleansing system" a corporate term for...toilets with 2.7 million purchased yearly in Japan.

According to the site, www.washlet.com, describes the model as "innovative and luxurious." Furthermore, it's "the bathroom accessory that turns your bathroom into an oasis of serenity and comfort. The Washlet uses water. Nature's most gentle and essential element. Purifying. Relaxing. Quite simply, the epitome of clean. The evolution of clean."

It also includes for obvious reasons, an air purifier built in the system and a warm air dryer. In other words and if I understand the concept correctly, the toilet does all the work that your hands have been doing without actually having to use your hands anymore. This means that all the user has to concern her/himself with is the actual physical act thereof of pushing or peeing. It's also good to note that the nozzle automatically self-cleans after each use.

It's not surprising that we haven't heard more about it since it could eliminate the use and presence of toilet paper and paper towels, hand dryers and of course sinks. No more having to wash our hands for five minutes singing a chorus of Mary Had a Little Lamb. Somehow, it just wouldn't be the same.


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Friday, March 23, 2007

SANJAYA SURVIVES THE CUT. WHY AMERICA, WHY?

Like many people, I enjoy American Idol because it's such fun and so easy to criticize the singers while relaxing in my den, watching them on TV. Usually, after watching contestants I will comment something to the effect: "not good, blank (whoever happens to sing that I believe to be bad). You're gonna have to be a lot better than that to stay in the running."

I like to think of myself as relatively objective when it comes to judging the Idol performers but one contestant - and I think I speak for many viewers - Sanjaya Malakar - is an enigma. Okay. The guy's got nice hair and he has a warm smile that shows lots of teeth but... The guy can't sing! How he's survived the cut so far is beyond my comprehension in spite of being in the bottom three. The only reason that I can think of is that if Simon Cowell expresses a complete disdain and distaste for a particular singer, America will automatically keep him. It's as if Idol watchers are purposely trying to spite Simon. Hence, Sanjaya's followers will get the word and the vote out.

Maybe the best tactic for Cowell to take is to smile while gritting his teeth and comment on some non-singing asset about the guy (Sanjaya) i.e. his hair is combed nicely or his outfit is nice. Perhaps then American Idol voters, in an effort to display their distaste for Simon's comments, will finally vote Sanjaya off. It's worth a shot - anything is at this point to end the agony.

http://thetrack.bostonherald.com/moreTrack/view.bg?articleid=190044&srvc=home


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BARBIE LOVES M¨A¨C? A NEW ROMANCE IN THE MAKING?

So I'm thumbing through an advertising booklet inserted in our local daily. You know the type that features beautiful models with faces air brushed to perfection wearing the latest and most expensive make up for Spring. We're talking here about names like Dior, Oscar de la Renta, Valentino, Lancôme...high end $$$$.

I usually skim through the booklet superficially because there's no way that I'm going to spend $30 for a lipstick and let's not even go into the moisterizers, which can reach the $100 mark. Would you believe - and I kid you not - that Barbie, of Barbie and Ken fame or notoriety was interviewed regarding her very own cosmetic line put out by M¨A¨C? It was a surreal interview with Barbie answering questions posed by an interviewer.

Interviewer? Barbie? She of Ken fame? Doll with the plastic permanent tippy-toe feet?

The first question the interviewer asked was why she teamed up with MAC on an makeup collection, to which she responded that they approached each other. Say what? How? Through a Barbie cell phone?

Barbie goes on to elaborate that she (Barbie) has the world's most recognizable faces and her (Barbie's) pink was their inspiration for creating the line. Let's keep in mind here that we're focusing on a makeup line dedicated to...a doll. Furthermore, she goes on to comment that she (Barbie) and MAC have a lot in common with a rich heritage in the fashion and beauty industry.

O-kay....Maybe...just maybe, somebody inhaled some bad chemicals?

The part I especially loved was the alluding to Barbie's age being 48 years old. The doll could be a grandmother! To this issue Barbie answered that she was forever a teenager. Aren't we all but then some never need the services of a plastic surgeon being...plastic. Am I really writing this?

When asked about making public appearances to promote her new line, Barbie answered that she will be very busy at the American International Toy Fair in New York when the collection appears in stores, so she won't be available for interviews.

Darn! Now there will be no chance of asking her about a rumored reconcilliation between Barbie and Ken. If you happen to attend the toy fair and have the opportunity to discuss makeup with the plastic legend- don't bring up GI Joe's name.Okay?


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Thursday, March 15, 2007

'SHE'S HAVING MY BA-BEEEEE...'

Is it just my imagination or has everyone of child bearing years Hollywood gone baby-on-board or to many of us, baby-I'm-bored?

Just finished reading a tidbit focusing on Tom Cruise & Katy Holmes or TomKat as they have become known to the public, alleged baby plans for the future. Seems that the gruesome-two-some were seen browsing in an upscale baby boutique asking salespeople to give them 4 scenarios for a boy's room. Instantly, this became gossip fodder for entertainment sites and writers, who dutifully reported it as an omen that they may be in a baby state of mind.

Like - do we really care? Obviously many of "us" do.

There was a time when expanding the family was a personal decision between a couple. These days it seems like the wife is the last one to find out she will be bearing a child after everyone else in the world has read or heard about it in the media.

When you think about it, bearing offspring has been around for...forever so why Hollywood types feel this necessity - nay - need to supply us with their productivity plans is a mystery.

My theory is that a long time ago - that would be a couple of years in Hollywood time - a celebrity and it could have been by accident, divulged to a gossip reporter that she (the celebrity) thought she may be pregnant. It was a slow day and said gossip reporter instantly grabbed on to the news and used it in a report. The viewing public being voracious for anything they feel could be juicy i.e. mommy and daddy supposedly happily married to others, watched for further reports in record numbers (ratings bonanza) and the race was on! Suddenly other young-ish (and not-so-youngish) couples knew a good thing when they saw it and gave their agents instructions to accidentally-on-purpose leak their infanticipating plans.

Madonna...Brad and Angelina a.k.a. Bradgelina or something, Britney...they all got on board and now we're being inundated with reports of baby rooms and decorating schemes, which newborns and 2 month olds are having play-dates. These kids can barely hold their heads up or are just learning to roll over and we're supposed to believe that they're having play-dates???

Gimme a break!

Next thing you know there will be reports of wild pacifier parties and raves, scandals featuring diaper exhibitionists, baby formula addicts, gripe water parties, teething rages in public... The usual Hollywood scandals that break out with seeming regularity.

Wanna bet that some smart entrepreneur - who knows could even be Donald Trump since he's in the baby mode- will come out with a new line of hair pieces for bald babies. Heaven knows he's got a big enough comb-over.


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Monday, March 12, 2007

KEN & GI JOE CALL IT QUITS

They said it was a relationship doomed right from the beginning - and they were right. The word going around is that it's over between KEN and GI JOE. The two have gone their separate ways with Ken returning to his beloved beach and GI Joe keeping the world safe from and for...everybody.

Although both claimed they were "just friends" sharing Ken's beach house, neighbors complained about "unusual" noises in the middle of the night.

"Damn neighbors should mind their own damn business!" GI Joe commented, when reporters confronted him with this information. "It's getting to the point where a damn soldier can't practice his damn target shooting anymore!"

Police reports revealed that they had visited the house on many occasions responding to complaints by an anonymous caller who kept repeating, 'Barbie - save me!' over and over. A naked GI Joe would appear outside the house, rifle in hand screaming: "Who called you, huh? Must'a been that nambly-pambly, pussy-wussy, Ken. Come one step closer and your peeing days are over, guys!"

Friends and family members believed that the relationship was doomed from the start with Ken never getting over his break-up with Barbie and GI Joe's penchant for combat weapons.

When told about the break-up Barbie commented that "like...Ken's new look is all wrong for him. Y'know?" Would the famous blond doll consider getting back together with her former boyfriend?

"Like...he's so yesterday," she commented. Barbie has been frequently seen tippy-toeing around town with Australian hunk, Blaine and her entourage of Bratz dolls.

For his part Ken commented, "I'm through with action dolls."

More reports are forthcoming.

Sunday, March 04, 2007

WHO'S WATCHING YOU? EVERYONE!

Just finished reading an interesting and somewhat personally disturbing piece about the occurrence of making a guest appearance on the WWW courtesy of someone, a virtual stranger in the true sense of the word. I'm referring to the current and wide-spread use of cell phone cameras that are so popular and prevalent these days, wherever one goes. It's more than a little unnerving bordering on creepy contemplating whether we're being monitored by someone holding a cell phone.

We're talking here about - for example - scratching "body parts", cleaning one's nostrils or attempting to extricate food from teeth using finger nails. Normal, everyday actions that are done in the hope that nobody is watching or at least taping our actions. However...somebody, somewhere could be making you a star - without you even knowing!

It's only natural that sites are emerging on the Web devoted to exposing people who commit "crimes" and "misemeanors", which could go unnoticed. Sites like www.isawyournanny.blogspot.com where citizens post descriptions of caregivers abusing or neglecting their charges. Included in the exposés are places and opportunities to skewer ex-lovers at www.dontdatehimgirl.com. Even local governments are getting involved using the Web to expose deadbeat dads in Ontario, www.goodparentspay.com that provides photos, names and descriptions.

This brings up an interesting legal and moral issue regarding the right to privacy and whether there should be legal repercussions for people who post photos strangers on the Web for all to see.

Meanwhile, here are some sites that do just that:

www.hollabacknyc.blogspot.com
http://www.don/www.isawyournanny.blogspot.com
http://www.litterbutt.com/http://www.platewire.com/, http://www.aboveaveragedriver.com/www.baddriving.com
www.mybikelane.com
http://www.caughtya.org/www.youparklikeanasshole.com
www.rudepeople.com

What do YOU think? Should there be legal repercussions for people who post photos of strangers on the Web without their permission or knowledge?


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